3/21/2011 (30 Weeks 3 days)

Eleanor is a lot happier without the IV lines in her arms.  She's getting all her nutrients from milk now, so they took out the glucose line.  They are still supplementing the milk with extra calories and she should be gaining weight soon.  Once she puts on a little weight it will be easier for her to maintain her body temperature.  I was very surprized that they took out the IVs already.  When they explained about increasing the feedings, I thought it would be a few weeks, maybe, before she could digest as much as she needed.  It seems like things are moving faster than I expect and I hope I'm ready for her when she's ready to come home.

I also expect to get some bad news every day, but so far, things have been really good.  She's still having a little apnea and they are going to give her a bit more caffeine to help keep her stimulated.  I got to hold her yesterday and she was very snuggly and fell right asleep in my arms.  Unfortunately, that caused a heart-rate drop, so I had to shake her up a little.  I learned that "pat her butt" means "shake vigorously" in nurse language.

She's still on and off the sun lamp, and I expect that will continue.  She's very wiggly and gets tangled up in her wires.  She also pulls out her CPAP tube so often that they considered taking it out.  The NICU nurses are all very sweet and are good at pushing me to do things for her even when I'm scared, like taking her temperature or changing her diaper.

The pumping is going well.  I'm up to almost 2 oz per session.  It still hurts a lot and the 2 hr thing is a drag, but when I see her and how good it is for her, it makes it easy to forget the inconvenience.  I've read that my body is putting the same nutrients into the milk now that she would be getting in the womb, so it also helps me feel a little less guilty about not being able to carry her longer.

I'm still struggling to figure out some kind of schedule or routine to get me through the day to day of the next few weeks.  It's still really easy to just crawl into bed and ignore everything.  But if there's ever been a time to put on the big girl panties, it's now.  And if I let the temptation to slack off get me now, then my priorities have been out of whack for a long time because I've been able to fight much harder for things far less important.
The other kids have been great.  Jackson is a little more clingy than usual, but Grace has been getting stellar conduct grades every day for the first time this year.  Margaret has been taking care of Jackson, cooking him lunch and taking care of scratches with the most elaborate home health care get-up you can imagine.
Thanks for all the comments.  I'm not sure I'll get to respond to everyone, but I do like to read them all and know you are all thinking of us!